Saturday, 24 May 2014

Use this TRICK to save money on your SKY TV subscription

Cancel it.

Just cancel that shit. I did it about a year ago and I now I wonder why I ever paid to have all that crap piped into my house.


I used to be a big TV watcher, in the winter of 2012-13 I spent a large chunk of time parked on the couch watching sports, movies, series, news.... everything it could mash into my blank face (it was a period of post-break up reflection).


Since I stopped watching TV (not just Sky, all broadcast TV) last May I've rediscovered the joy of reading, of walking, the cinema, I took up running, I started learning guitar. I make up own mind up about current events. I have no fucking idea what the royal family are up to.


I don't understand where I found the time to watch 3 hours of TV a day, twice that on weekends.


I moved into a new flat last May and it wasn't straightforward how I could get an aerial feed into my room. After about 6 weeks I realised I didn't miss TV so I made the leap.


TV is an out-dated medium anyway, like newspapers. Consign it to history.


I still own a smashing Samsung LED TV and indeed still pay the licence fee. I like watching movies and some big series like Breaking Bad and Game of Thrones (although I'm getting bored of the latter) but it adds up to about an hour or two a week. Anything that features Stewart Lee or Charlie Brooker will not be missed.


When I see the news or adverts or the reality shows the style and content is almost indistinguishable from the dystopian broadcasts imagined in Total Recall and RoboCop. It's mental.


So if you want to save money on your TV bill just cancel it. Cancel SKY, bin BT, fuck netflix. It's scary when you think of what you'll do for all those hours. Don't worry. You'll find a hobby, a new passion, rediscover an old one. 


Personally I took up running and I'm in the shape of my life physically and mentally.


Join us.




Monday, 28 April 2014

The key to happiness



Being happy is more or less a personal choice. You don't need to rely on anyone or anything for your happiness.

You ever notice when you run through in your mind an argument you've had (or are planning to have) you can feel yourself getting angry or wound up? You can sense your pulse quicken and that unmistakable well of injustice rising in your belly.

That's you choosing to be angry.

When you think about a terrible tragedy befalling a loved one you can feel the emotions stir, a lump might even form in your throat.

You're choosing to be sad. An imaginary situation is making you feel real emotions.

Try, instead, to make a habit of choosing to be happy. Think about happy memories, imagine yourself surprising a loved one with a gift, day dream amazing scenarios. 

You can also try these things, they all work for me;
  • Take the stairs
  • Don't smoke
  • Walk and run more
  • Eat less shitty processed foods
  • Don't watch TV
  • Sit up straight
  • Listen to people
  • Don't hold a grudge
  • Stop putting that thing off
  • Learn a creative skill
  • Drink more water
  • Take a break from the booze
  • Don't make your life about the pursuit of money
  • Smile

Easy.

My blog has been viewed

Someone actually read a few posts and now I'm self-concious about what I'm posting.

This is probably something I should get over if I want to become known for what I write.

Friday, 18 April 2014

First day of Spring

Not a cloud in the sky today and it's actually warm therefore Spring is declared OPEN.

I was sitting on the balcony at work catching some sun and my mind wandered to all the springs and summers I wasted in my teens and twenties. Sitting about doing fuck all as if I'd worked hard all winter and had earned a break.


I've suddenly, in my 35th year, become aware of the passing of time and what I've chosen to fill it with. While I occasionally think of the opportunities I've wasted over the years I don't dwell on them. I don't let it affect me because what's important is what I (and you) do from now. This moment right now and all the moments to come are what will define us.


Make them count.


(I've not blogged in ages but I've done a lot since then so I'll catch up. I'll also try and write something every day or so. Some topics are: the new guy at work, the girl I met in California, my business ideas and some bullshit about motivation)


(Who the fuck am I speaking to? Literally no one reads this)


Thursday, 13 March 2014

The internet has had its day

There will soon be a generation who see social networking as a shit thing their parents do. Facebook will be the most embarrassing website in world.


Companies will scale back or remove their web-presence and advertise the fact that they are not associated with the internet so they must be very exclusive and aspirational. (Why would they want any schmuck with a computer to be able to get their product?)
The internet will be used only by machines and devices and will be something that runs in the background with little or no conscious interaction from humans.

People will go back to writing letters (they are very hard to hack) and keeping journals.

Almost everything will be attached to the internet. Already your phone, computer,  TV, console, media player, printer, car, camera, picture frame, watch, fridge, book, toys and glasses can be on line.

Tuesday, 11 March 2014

I started drinking again

Couple of weeks ago I was out on a date and had a single bottle beer (I was driving), it was a good night and I felt fine, well maybe not fine but OK, about my dryathalon ending on 51 days.

Next night I had 4 or 5 beers with my buddy and didn't feel so great but wasn't too broken about being actually drunk for the first time since 28th December 2013.


I was out on a 2nd date the following week and tanned about 5 beers at a comedy club. I was starting to feel that I was back on the booze but justified it by the fact that I liked this girl and it was for the greater good (that being actual sex). 


This past weekend I went out with a friend for snooker on Thursday, dinner and a movie on Friday (different friend), dinner with my parents on Saturday, a post Half Marathon drink on Sunday and finally a wander around town on my day off yesterday. 


Every day has included a few drinks. Not enough to give me a bad hangover or blackouts but enough to accumulate to a point where today I feel miserable and de-motivated.


Fucking hell. I need to stop drinking AGAIN. At least this time I have a target of 51 days dry to beat.


I forgot how expensive booze was, I've gone through shit loads of money in the last two weeks. I've also had some spots come out on my face. Sheesh.


Wednesday, 12 February 2014

I have a lot of epiphanies these days

I'm not sure why but it seems the last few months my knowledge of shit has changed. I feel like I understand things better; why people do the things they do, why the world is the way it is, what songs are going on about, what it takes to succeed and why we fail. 

For what felt like most of my life there was a lot of shit I just didn't 'get'. I felt I was missing something that everyone else had, like a class I missed at school or a meeting I forgot to attend. I always felt quite naive, I had a simplistic view on the world. I'm not thick but I've never felt streetwise or particularly intuitive. 'Emotionally retarded', might be one way to put it.

I don't think I am that any more.

Sunday, 2 February 2014

Here's January in review

96 miles run
9 weight sessions
5 lbs of fat shed
1 pint of blood donated
1 exam passed
0 units of alcohol

What a great start to the year. I've been training like a beast (the jungle kind, not the 70s BBC kind), and I've been doing very well at work.

You have to think this is down to the no-drink policy. I knew I'd be able to train harder (last year I took nearly a month off it) but I didn't expect my memory to be better, my thinking clearer and my confidence greater.

I think back to the fucking worst hangovers I had last year and the further away I get from them the less I want to go back. It was like hitting a reset button every weekend, any fitness or self-esteem I'd built up during the week was often drowned in a big sesh and then wiped out from a dose of the FEAR.

So I'm staying off it for February. I've no reason to have a drink and many not to. It's that simple.

I did a bit of socialising without the urge to have a drink. Went out to a couple of movies, dinner, snooker etc. The only friction I got was from my best mate who's reaction to my ongoing abstinence went from shock to confusion to disgust, but that's just how it goes with mates. I enjoy that side of it.

I passed up the chance to hit a couple of bars on three occasions, not because I thought I might fold but because I just felt I wouldn't be totally comfortable. This is the only thing I need to get over and it's not a big thing. Like anything in life; it only seems a problem when you're avoiding it. If you look at something, work out what you need to do, do it, these so-called problems disappear.

About six weeks ago I picked up a guitar (with intention) for the first time in my life and struggled to pick out a D-chord. It hurt my fucking fingers, fingers which couldn't even reach the bits I needed to reach.

But I stuck at it. 15 minutes here and there, taking guidance from the awesome Justin Guitar and I can tell you that as of tonight I could pick up any six-string in the fucking world and give you not only a D-chord but a motherfucking A-chord too.

It still hurts my god-damn fingers but that'll get better without me even working on it. I just need to practice the chords and my soft, IT, keyboard-tapping fingers will man up eventually.

Philip Seymour Hoffman died today: one of the few actors who didn't seem to act. Apparent heroin overdose. Fuck.

Monday, 20 January 2014

Why I Need to Quit Drinking


  • The shame
  • The cost to health and wallet
  • The blackouts
  • The depression
  • The FEAR
  • The total inability to drink in moderation
  • The utter shite I talk when I'm wasted


  • I started drinking regularly when I was 17/18 and have done it constantly since then (except maybe for a couple of years when I preferred to take a smoke). I've always just assumed that it makes a night out better, that it makes me more comfortable, that wine makes the meal, that gigs need beers.

    But I've nothing to compare it against, how do I know what life is like without alcohol? I was a fucking tit when I was 18 so any life decisions I made around then must be viewed with serious scepticism.

    I wrote that list on Feb 8th 2013 but I just wasn't ready to quit. I feel ready now. I'm still reticent to tell people I've stopped drinking and the furthest I've committed too is June (when I do the Edinburgh Marathon and Tough Mudder) but in my head (and my heart) I've already had my last drink.

    I'm on my 20th day sober and so far have avoided any real challenges. I was out with some friends for a burger on Friday and initially 4 beers were ordered but I was happy with a bottle of the house water. Later there was a spare beer but I didn't feel at all urged to take it. Saturday night I was at a gig and had to hold my friends beer while she went to the bar for more. It was an ice cold can of Red Stripe, normally a staple gig swig but there was no desire (or indeed point) to have a mouthful.

    The real challenges will come eventually; some good news to celebrate or bad news to commiserate but I am bang up for it. I felt a huge relief and joy when I quit smoking last year and the same feeling is welling up for quitting alcohol too.



    Sunday, 19 January 2014

    Happiness and Karma

    I was walking up Buchanan Street (in Glasgow, my home) today and from a distance I saw a guy begging. I've seen him there before and he's one of those beggars who smiles and says God Bless to the people who walk past while they pretend he's not there. He looks about my age and actually looks happier than the people scurrying around him with their shopping.



    Buchanan Street is an incredibly busy shopping area, all about brand presence and people with bags of expensive new objects. It's one of those cathedrals to capitalism and consumerism that have become the embodiment of our aspirational culture.

    Which is fine if you like that sort of thing but it grates with me that we're still being sold this dream while so many in our society have fuck all. The old rich/poor gap is getting wider and it's conveniently summed up in a guy begging on Buchanan Street.

    I'd already decided today that I'd help someone out, do someone a solid, if and when the opportunity presented itself. For no reason other than I am extremely lucky to have what I have and felt like passing it on.

    I approached the guy and crouched with him, said; "sorry I don't have any change but can I get you a coffee or something?", he said he'd love a hot chocolate from the bakery he was sitting near, (the bakery was that UK chain bakery we all know, cheap and shit). I asked if he'd prefer one from the fancier mega-corp hippy coffee chain that was 100yds down the road; after a moments thought he said he would prefer that. I offered him a bacon buttie too, which no-one in their right mind would refuse.

    So I got the hot chocolate and bacon buttie, delivered it (he briefly tried to ask me for change before he remembered our meeting and agreement from five minutes ago) and crouched with him for a few minutes, said I hoped things picked up for him soon and Robert told me about his plan to move into some accommodation and take the small steps to getting back on his feet to tread the glorious path to bags of Buchanan Street booty. He said he was trying to keep off the drink, I mentioned that I stopped drinking at new year but then realised how absurd it was to try and compare our battles with booze and moved the chat back to him.

    I became conscious that his buttie and drink were getting cold in the freezing Glasgow air and said goodbye. I headed on up the street with a decent feeling in my heart; I'd done someone that favour and I briefly pondered if karma would repay me.

    I decided I wanted a coffee after all the goodwilling I'd been doing and cut into another chain (who make better drinks than the aforementioned hippies) and made my order. I must have been giving off a self-righteous glow because the (very attractive) barista asked, "What are you so smiley about?", I just said I was generally like that (I am) and why not? She was the same type and we had a brief conversation about happiness and having a positive outlook on life, she put my coffee on the counter and said, "that's on the house."

    And that's how karma works, so be nice to someone today.

    Thursday, 9 January 2014

    A year in review

    I mentioned briefly that I had to learn a guitar tune before the end of last year but I didn't get round to it. I had a go but didn't even master one chord (d). 

    I'm going to stick at it but I'm prepared to accept that I'm shit at music. Six months. If I can't play a tune that encourages woman to remove their clothes by then, I'll pack it in.

    Other than that I had a decent run last year, I did almost all the things I set out to, including;

    Giving blood
    Growing a beard
    Climbing a Munro 
    Visit mainland europe alone
    Stopped smoking
    Passed some industry exams
    Ran a 10K
    Got slimmer
    Spent a month off the drink
    Got a promotion and pay rise
    Went on a random adventure with an Australian girl
    Moved to a better flat
    Saw some amazing artists (The Boss, Arcade Fire, Edward Sharpe)
    Saw some amazing art in London and Milan

    I didn't manage to;

    Get a tattoo
    Save a shit load of money
    Learn to touch type

    Writing that list reminded me of what an amazing year it's been, possibly the best ever. I started 2013 miserable after a good relationship went bad but I ended it feeling better than I can ever remember feeling.

    Taking a booze break

    Probably along with a million other people, granted, but I'm more serious at it than them. I stayed pretty sober on Hogmanay and indeed spilled the single bottle of beer I saved to drink (on my own) after the bells. So that's given me at least a one day head start on all the other dry-outs but more like four days judging by the amount of people having one last tear-up on the 4th.

    I stayed off the booze for a couple of weeks in one stretch last year and for a month in total, bar one or two glasses of wine or a fly beer. I'm saying that like it's an accomplishment when it's actually pretty damning.


    I've been mulling the idea for a while (I have an Evernote titled "Why I need to Stop Drinking" dated 5th Feb 2013) but now appears to be the time to go ahead with it. It feels right.


    I'm not daunted at this point because over the last year I've made a few other lifestyle changes that seemed hard work at first but very quickly became the new normal and very rewarding. I stopped smoking in July and took up running shortly thereafter. Both have provided an immeasurable fillip to my physical and mental health and stopping alcohol will only provide a further boost. I am going to be insufferably chirpy.


    Drinking is expensive and I don't really have any spare money. I earn a good wage and live a nice standard of life but I'm financially irresponsible so there's nothing to fall back on. If I lose my job I'm homeless tomorrow. This is possibly the biggest insecurity in my life. Not having to buy booze will mean it's easy for me to fix this.


    Alcohol destroys my fitness, even in small quantities. I'm quite serious about the running and it's incredible how poorly I perform after drinking. I've entered the Edinburgh Marathon on the 25th May (and the Inverness Half Marathon on 9th March as a warm up) and the thought of being able to cross that line in a good time is the thing that will help me say FUCK YOU to temptation.


    So that's me, dry until May 25th at least. I feel sorry for my friends.

    Monday, 25 November 2013

    Six weeks in...

    That's how long ago I kicked off this idea.

    Money saved: £0.00

    Aha but I do have about €100 in a drawer somewhere, that should count, shouldn't it?

    Money saved: €100 (approx.)


    Just over three weeks since my last post, what has happened? I finished that Movember 10K in 47:47. Numerical alliteration aside, it was a shitey time. I took a stitch at about 7K and couldn't run it off and eventually had to walk for a  few minutes.

    I spent a week in my hometown which was nice but reminded why I'm glad I don't live there any more.

    I went to an Arcade Fire gig, sorry "The Reflektors", it was fucking brilliant, not least because just about every cunt followed the dress code and put on their Sunday best or in some cases, fancy dress. Magic.

    I procured a guitar and I must learn at least one tune before the year's end.

    Wednesday, 30 October 2013

    There's been a couple of set backs...

    My two-pronged plan of getting in shape and saving a shit-load of money took a couple of hits last week; one to each prong.

    I caught a cold, a minor one but a cold nonetheless. I haven't been for a run in the last 10 days so I'm worried that I've missed some good training for the Movember run a week Sunday. I was about to go for a treadmill session last night but I couldn't find my running headphones and the thought of listening to Pure Gym's hellish playlist put me right off. I did a half-hearted back and biceps session in the hoose instead. I'll have to do 10K tonight, then on Friday and finally Sunday morning on Glasgow Green as my final practice.


    I couldn't find my headphones because I put them in a pocket I don't normally use thanks to me trying out the pair I got with my new phone. Which leads me to the hit my savings took.


    My phone, a Galaxy SIII, had a big crack in the screen. It worked fine but it didn't look great so I investigated getting it repaired. The option were pay £60 to get it done in a shop, or pay £11 to buy the parts myself. 


    I chose the latter and carefully came in about my phone with a hair-dryer and blade. Before long there was an expensive sounding crunch and small explosion of glass-shards as I reconfigured a delicate piece of technology into a coaster. It's not even a coaster in fact because bits of fucking glass keeps falling off it.


    My savings took a hit to the tune of £299.95 but I rationalised it by looking at the amount of use I get from the phone and it will be extremely useful to have one in foreign countries.


    Lesson learned: aggressively saving money is fine but don't let it make you think you're fucking Inspector Gadget.

    Wednesday, 16 October 2013

    Here's my new watch

    I needed a new wristwatch.

    My previous, a particularly convincing TAG Heuer counterfeit which captured the obnoxious over-design really quite accurately (less can be said for the time it kept), met its demise in some kind of drunken fall. I'm not sure of the details, I woke after a good old booze-up and it was hanging off my wrist in bits.

    A few weeks ago I was window shopping and came across Fossil and their fantastic range of fancy looking timepieces, all around the £100 mark. I'd found my watch, or at least I'd found a few to choose from but I would think about it and come back a week later to buy.

    Unluckily for Fossil, in the subsequent week I had my money-saving epiphany and suddenly £100 for a watch seemed absurd. Especially one that isn't water resistant.

    This led me to look for something cheaper, tougher and simpler and I ended up with the cheapest, toughest, simplest and coolest fucking watch on the planet. For £11.55.

    This little bastard will travel the world



    Can a watch be described as 'timeless'? Certainly the Casio F-91W has survived more than 20 years of changing fashion and technological progress to remain a massive selling product.

    The F-91W can be bracketed with the Adidas Gazelle, the Swiss Army Knife and Magic Trees as a product with an enduring appeal to men who can take care of business.

    Its continued popularity is ode to an elegant economy, a no-nonsense build that shines like a beacon, a tiny green beacon, in a world with an abundance of over-sized, over-designed and over-prices timepieces.

    It remains iconic in a time of ever-changing icons. Its cult fed by a vast appeal from fathers to fashionistas, from teenagers to terrorists.

    This unassuming, tough little watch has never pretended to be anything more than an accurate, affordable digital watch but somewhere along the line it became cool.

    Truly the Casio F-91W is the watch of our times.

    Monday, 14 October 2013

    Here's the plan

    Sometime last week, I'm not sure exactly what day, I took the decision to travel the world. I guess this will mean quitting my job, selling all my objects and buying a one-way ticket to a far-away country. Probably Thailand. No, Australia. Actually it might have to be Germany.

    This isn't a spur of the moment thing; I've spent over 34 years meandering towards this point in my life. 

    So there's the headline. My 'mission statement' if you like that sort of bullshit. I've got a vague framework bouncing around my head and this will start to take shape in the coming weeks, like a Lego spaceship. I fancy myself as a writer you see, and I'm not going to let the handicap of no experience, little education and careless approach to proof reading spoil it for me. These may, however, spoil it for you, dear reader.

    Yes there are a couple of travel blogs out there already, over ten in fact. This is no surprise. In the Venn diagram of travellers and would-be writers of this world there was bound to be some overlap. I'm not actually expecting anyone to find, let alone read, this blog and I'm happy with that because I don't think I'm any good at it yet. I've been partly inspired by the stories of NeverEndingVoyage20-SomethingTravel and Ashley Cowie but I'm not banking on making any money out of this. Not at first.

    Over the coming year or so I'll be posting regular updates, each more interesting and poetic than the last, journaling my preparation to travel around the globe. By the time I set off I imagine I'll be weaving such vivid tales in 400 words that National Geographic themselves will be there, contract in hand, to see me off.

    There we have it; everything I do from here on in must propel me towards that goal. Every morning I have to ask myself, "What are you going to do today to achieve your dream?”

    In the coming posts I'll fill in some back story about who the fuck I am, how the fuck I got here and why the fuck I'm doing this. I'll maybe post up some of my previous travel journals. I'll get some details of the intense savings plan I'll be working on. All this will be in the matey, talk-to-the-reader tone I've kicked off with, most will be funnier, and some might be insightful and reflective. There will be bad language.

    So that's the plan and the first post of what should prove to be an award-winning blog and best-selling book. 


    I put this motivational picture here as a thank you for reading.